Keepers of Fortitude - Saryrn / Bertoxxulous

LOL I've got Kil conditioned the same way...
he's finally accepting that my food=my food and his food-30 seconds=my food so he tends to eat pretty quickly...
There's been quite a few meals where the compliment to the chef (me) is along the lines of "That was great honey!.... what was it?"

/agree Ryver

was starting to think I smelled funny... :(

hehehehehe

/comfort Bayal

if it makes you feel any better, Kil will be in the same boat in about 1 1/2-2 months :p

for now he's just stocking up on chocolate and getting used to tuning me out :rolleyes:

early congratulations on your daughter and /sympathy /comfort to your wife.

/huggles!

http://espn.go.com/mlb/columns/stark_jayson/1201283.html

um......

nm


*walks off trying to pull mind out of gutter*

HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL
 
1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if you were holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow to close mouth and swallow.
 
2. Retreive pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
 
3. Retreive cat from bedroom and throw away soggy pill.
 
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right index finger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
 
5. Retreive pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from yard.
 
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
 
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy a new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink one beer to take taste away. Apply bandaid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door on neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink another beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve friggen' cat from tree across road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie the little asstards front paws to rear paws with twine and bind tightly to leg of dining room table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for Humane Society to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL

1. Wrap it in bacon

LOL
I was 14 hours and 7lb 5oz.... Kil was 22 hours and 14lbs 3oz

/cry

can I get a redo?

So, it's not a baby anymore... it's now mutated into an octopus. No other explanation for it kicking bladder, lung, pelvic bone and kidney simultaneously.... right ribs hurt... tummy looks like cat in gunnysack...

HOW LONG DOES THIS THING HAVE TO STAY UP THERE???

/comforts Karlah
/eyes rolling stomach with suspicion
/glares at Kiltrix

/huggles hunny
I know the feeling, and it took me almost a year and a half before I thought that I might be willing to play again...
Even still, all of my online time is when I'm playing with my hunny on our alts in empty midlevel dungeons on abandoned continents. I guess I'm just not ready to jump back into the whole "vision" that used to be so damned important before I just couldn't take it anymore and had to walk away before I started screaming.
I thought my account was killed for over 6 months before it occured to me (as I was going thru my computer files- I removed most of EQ completely from my computer and forgot about it) to try to log on and see what happened... and I guess Aeld wasn't willing to die off just yet.
Don't snuff Slams unless you're just not willing to pay the monthly... even if it's just to log on to the chat function like Korba and jabber at people while you surf the net, we'll still be happy to see you around. And you're always welcome to make a mini char and come wander aimlessly around in the forgotten world of kunark with Kil and I siccing green things on eachother and making bets on the winner while we're looking for big cliffs to "fall" off of.
If you're looking for something to keep you entertained, I would suggest accumulating some anime.. since I stopped playing eq, I built up a collection of over 300 subbed episodes of like 8 different shows and still dl weekly for Inuyasha and Naruto. Of course, I'd bet my comp would run a hell of alot faster if I'd finish burning it instead of letting it take up space, but eh... I'll get to it. :p
Anyways sweets, the greatest thing about this particular family (and my lowbie arse is proof of this) is the fact that you are always welcome back if you ever want to return... so take a breather, go check out the sunshine, find a pool to live in for the summer and think about it again in 3 months or so. :)
And if you never go back to the game, then at least keep up with the boards periodically or I will personally hunt you down (all 150 lbs of my fat arse- acrobatic alien included) and make you come do yardwork for me. :D
I don't like goodbyes, so I'll see you later.
/huggles
Aeld... aka Stacy

I used to have a pet spidey (after the tarantula) who ran around my room... He kept the leezard entertained (did I mention I had a 4'7" iguana?) and pissed off the cat (who also pissed off the leezard) and ate all the bugs, real and feared (we don't like cockroaches, nope nope nope). He used to scare my brother alot because he'd sit on my blanket and scurry in circles whenever the door opened. I'd just bat him onto the floor when I wanted to get in bed and he'd scurry off to some other corner of the room. He was my fuzzy eight legged friend....

Of course, he wasn't anything near as creepy as those pictures and he couldn't wrap his legs around my head.... and I know I never saw pincers on him that looked like those....

Your spideys scare me.

ooh ooh!!

So when can I collect??
:p

/huggles old man

Happy Birthday Sweets :)

OMFG

um......

ok, there is something seriously wrong with any area that has critters with legs that big....

I think the largest spidey I've ever seen was my pet tarantula and he was still small enough to fit on that thing's head...

/checks under the desk for the 3rd time

If I have nightmares about mansized spideys jumping around trying to eat me, I'm holding you personally responsible Fizz. :p

lub j00 slams

Winning bid:  US $3,850.00  

*sniff*

ah well, and here I thought the way to make the good money was to have a large skeery biker guy dress up in a wedding gown or similarily unexpected attire and make up a good story to go with it...

*tells Kil to take the ballerina outfit off and heads back to the drawing boards*