bah diets

[Karlah]

Here's the final word on nutrition and health.  It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting medical studies.

Diets & Dying

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British, Australians or New Zealanders.

2. The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British, Australians or New Zealanders.

3. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British, Australians or New Zealanders.

4. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British, Australians or New Zealanders.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British, Australians or New Zealanders.

CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like.  Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

[Leiyah]

The Stress Diet

Breakfast:
1/2 grapefruit
8 ozs. skim milk
1/2 dry toasted piece of bread

Lunch:
Herbal tea
6 ozs. chicken breast topped with 1 oz mustard if you choose
1 slice cheese
1 small chocolate chip cookie

Mid Afternoon Snack:
1 banana
8 ozs purified water
3 ozs. steamed carrots
Rest of the box of chocolate chip cookies
12 oz bag of M&Ms

Dinner:
1 large pepperoni pizza
5 boxes of Bonbons
2 loaves of garlic bread
4 24oz beers
Entire frozen cheesecake eaten directly from the box
1 quart of double chocolate fudge ice cream

[Radx]

my diet
 
Breakfast:
20oz soda

Lunch:
Pizza or a ham sub or sandwich
20oz soda

Dinner:
4 2liter sodas

[Leiyah]

"...24 packs of be-er-sooooda!"

*Name that movie!


I can't drink "soda" (and it's not soda it's pop damnit!) - carbonation makes me cry from ouchie belly afterwards.

[Soulstar]

mountain dew = holy water

[Fizzgig]

soft drink

and mountaindew is evil

Coke however has biblical referance

[Leiyah]

Actually mountain dew is the perfect breakfast drink -- seeing as it has the caffiene that so many people rely on to wake up in the morning and orange juice in it also!

[Kenlaen]

The movie I believe is Tommy Boy. Happens after he comes home from college and his dad gives him his office. Right?

[Leiyah]

That is correct!

/snicker

[Laiynla]

Diet coke!!!!!

caffeine, no calories!

I used to be a Dr Pepper advocate,  but since my metabolism slowed down I cant afford the calories,  and the diet tastes like CRRRAP!

[Radx]

diet is also worse for ya

[Karlah]

One of the ladies at work thought I drank far too much Coke, so sent me this........ I'm currently rethinking my fluid choices.
Kar

***************************************************

"We all know that water is important but I've never seen it written down like this before.

WATER
1. 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. (Likely applies to half world population.)

2. In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger.

3. Even MILD dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as much as 3%.

4. One glass of water will shut down midnight hunger pangs for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a University of Washington study.

5. Lack of water, the #1 trigger of daytime fatigue.

6. Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers.

7. A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on a printed page.

8. Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%, and one is 50%less likely to develop bladder cancer. Are you drinking the amount of water you should every day?

COKE

1. In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of Coke in the trunk to remove blood from the highway after a car accident.

2. You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of coke and it will be gone in two days.

3. To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl and let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Coke removes stains from vitreous china.

4. To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a rumpled-up piece of aluminium foil dipped in Coca-Cola.

5. To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of
Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion.

6. To loosen a rusted bolt: Applying a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the rusted bolt for several minutes.

7. To bake a moist ham: Empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminum foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the Coke for a sumptuous brown gravy.

8. To remove grease from clothes: Empty a can of coke into a load of greasy clothes, add detergent, and run through a regular cycle. The Coca-Cola will help loosen grease stains. It will also clean road haze from your windshield.

FOR YOUR INFORMATION:

1. The active ingredient in Coke is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8. It will dissolve a nail in about four days. Phosphoric acid also leaches calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in osteoporosis.

2. To carry Coca-Cola syrup (the concentrate) the commercial truck must use the Hazardous Material place cards reserved for highly corrosive materials.

3. The distributors of coke have been using it to clean the engines of their trucks for about 20 years!

Now the question is, would YOU like a glass of water or coke?"

[Radx]

coke please

[Leiyah]

coke is yucky LOL

[vivace]

i prefer water over pop/soda. no lemon no ice straw with the paper still on it.